ROFL.
One time my other cousin (who was about 4 at that time) really did not like her mom's err... big-boned coworker. The woman asked her for a hug and she said, "You know, if I hug you, I'm scared I'm going to bounce back farrrrrr farrrrr away!" -laura driver
When my son was about 3, I painted his tiny toes with metallic blue polish (because he'd asked - not my idea). When I was done, he signed dramatically, looked at his feet and said happily, "Now I'm a REAL boy.
-whit
As I was drying my 5-year-old son after his bath, my 3-year-old daughter pointed at his chest and asked "What are those?", referring to his nipples. I said "Those are nipples, sweetie, everyone has them." My son then informed my daughter that hers will get bigger, and when she's a grown-up she will be able to "milk a baby."-Kathy S.
My children's school had a mock election. My little Kindergartner was asked to tell the class who he was voting for and why.
He said "I'm voting for Ahrocka Nabama because my Mom says the white guy is old and he tells lies"-KellyGreenT.
i Have no idea why, but this cracks me up...
We were kids (she was around 8) attending Catholic mass and got to the portion of the mass where the congregation is supposed to respond "Lord I am not worthy to receive you but only say the word and I shall be healed." This is right before communion. My sister had her head bowed, hands folded and intoned solemnly, "Lord I am not worthy to receive you but only say the word and I shall eat you."-Susan.C
and finally...
My daughter, age 3, from the back seat as we drove by something strange:
"What the hell??!"
Me: "Honey, um, you really shouldn't say hell."
3yo daughter: "Oh, I didn't say hell. I said health, god damnit."- Kate
ROFL!